I hear this phrase uttered a lot in the SN community, even with other disorders. My son has Aspergers, CP, Asthma and a few other things. Sometimes, I ask myself, would I change this if I could. Honestly, I don't know. If I took away his "issues," would I be doing it for me or for him? Am i taking them away because The World doesn't accept him? Am I making him conform just because of what others expect? If I take it away, how would it change him? Would he no longer be in love with Star Trek? Would he not obsess over Mario so much that he has no interest in playing anymore? Would he not be happy sitting under me on the couch playing video games on Saturday morning? He probably wouldn't be a complete nerd like me. Would he enjoy symphonies and nature sounds or Star Wars? He was the only one of my 3 who wanted to go to the Navy Band Concert with me, even Jeremy wouldn't go with me. I would miss all the Haydenisms and one-liners. I would miss the matter-of-fact statements when someone does or says something stupid. Will I miss laughing as I watch him eat boiled eggs with sour cream? Would he give me the elaborate story telling when telling me a dream to the point that I'm convinced he's making this up as he goes? What would I lose about him? Would he be as good at math and science as he is now? Would he watch Sci-fi with me? Of my three kids, he's my only nerd. lol. He may not have a ton of friends but he has 1 or 2 that understand him. Isn't that all we need in life? Yeah, the emabarassing sensory overloads in public would stop. Yeah, he'd eat the food on his plate without gagging from texture. There would be no more ABA. No running back and forth to therapies. He would have been able to participate in T-ball and actually finish a game. I would know when he's in pain or sick. He would be able to play outside for more than 5min. But would he still be the same kid? I would miss having someone see the world from the same point of view I do.
I never utter this statement cause I don't know if I would or wouldn't. He's fine who he is. I'm fine who I am. I have accepted our life and moved on. In fact, i wouldn't change him or me. I would change society that says HE must conform.
